User Profile

Hi, my name is Dr. Gregory House, and I am currently condemned to Hell. No, not Hell as in the fire and brimstone version - that would be much too appealing - but Hell as in clinic duty, the ceaseless march of brain dead drones through the white doors of medical responsibility, soul-sucking entities bent on wreaking havoc with their blank eyes and drooling stares, sick ramblings that would drive any living creature insane.

I am told Dante skipped this level in his travels. Pity.

If you're reading this right now, and by reading I mean processing the words on this screen through the synapses of your as-yet functional brain, then I can assume the following three things. You are a) Alive, b) Literate, and c) Capable of navigating a simple electronic device with some degree of success. Congratulations! Welcome to the upper 50% of the gene pool.

With that pesky little detail out of the way, let me introduce myself properly. I am Dr. Gregory House, medical doctor, maverick diagnostician, and resident genius at the esteemed Princeton-Plainsboro Teaching Hospital in New Jersey. I hold a double specialty in infectious disease and nephrology, both accredited by the AMA, and currently head the Department of Diagnostic Medicine, under which work my three lovely serfs staff members - Dr. Allison Cameron, the fashion model, Dr. Eric Foreman, the car thief, and Dr. Robert Chase, the British homosexual. Don't worry. They're all very qualified.

I also suffer from a limp thanks to the wonderful misdiagnostic powers of the former department head, recently deceased, requiring the daily usage of a cane and copious Vicodin intake. This is not an addiction or a habit; I don't take them because I find little white pills yummy. Well, maybe just a bit. This is a pain problem. If you can't deal with that fact, then let me kindly introduce you to what prolonged muscle death feels like.

Since this is my personal journal, or "El Jay" as those gremlins on the Interwebs tell me, I intend to use it to its fullest potential in tormenting every village idiot that passes my way. Don't think you will be spared.

...Wilson, if you're reading this, I want my e-mail off that spam list now.

Personal RP journal maintained by firestorm717's House muse. Please feel free to disturb.

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